Going off of yesterday's post, these so-called "toner" shoes are all the rage nowadays. And by all the rage, I mean I know exactly two people who currently wear them. Since I always giggle to myself whenever I see someone wearing these most ridiculous shoes, I figured I'd make them the subject of the second installment of WiscFit's (award-winning) Bullshit Fitness series...
FitFlops, one of the leading toner shoes currently on the market, force your feet to work harder to stabilize your body. They do this in two different ways. When you walk, you generally land on your heel, and then end up pushing off of your toe to go into the next step. This natural rocking motion is exaggerated slightly by FitFlops, causing your feet to work just a tiny bit harder to find it's equilibrium.
FitFlops also use a 3-layer "microwobbleboard" design. In the heel, they use a high density material. I don't know why, and I don't think they do either. It just seemed to fit I guess. Apparently, it absorbs 22% more shock than normal heel strikes do, which is great if you're trying to beat out the worst shoe ever made in a quality contest*.
From the high density heel, your bodyweight is forced into the midsole of the shoe, which is constructed of some sort of low-density, high-quality, inedible marhmallow-esque material. This makes your foot go "Whoa! What happened to that nice stable surface I was just working with back in the heel?".
From there, all that's left to do is push off of your toe into the next step. The toe of the FitFlop is made out of some medium-density material. Again, I don't know why, and I don't think the FitFlop people do either. They already used the high and low densities. Medium was really all that was left. Seriously, that's all I got on this one.
Here are just a few of the claims made by these shoes. FitFlops can, have, and/or will:
So what's my overall opinion on these shoe-tastrophies (yeah, I made that a word, what?!)? Save your money and your dignity, and invest in a pair of minimalist shoes, like some vibrams. Why? A whole bunch of reasons...
1) The only workout that FitFlops will give you (or any toner shoes for that matter) is a low-quality foot workout. Don't get me wrong, this is a very good thing. But they just do it in such a ridiculous way that I can't justify the benefits with the costs. Vibrams, one of the leading minimalist/barefoot shoes currently out there, will give your feet 10 times the foot workout that any toners ever will. This is because your foot has to stabilize everything every time you walk. There is no shoe to absorb shock or help stabilize or unstabilize your foot, or whatever these toners claim to do. Honestly, now that I think about it, I'm not even sure that the limited amount of science backing up FitFlops is sound.
2) Speaking of not making sense, just stay away from anything you see that uses a line like "patent-pending, muscle-loading, micro wobbleboard midsole technology". Whenever a company has to add adjectives like "muscle-loading" to their product, it's most likely bullshit.
3) One of the major drawbacks to these products is that, for as comfortable as they are, anybody wearing FitFlops looks ridiculous. Not even joking. That was and is one of the major roadblocks keeping more people from buying these pathetic excuses for shoes. If you want odd looks from people, buy some vibrams. They're so much cooler...
The upshot: If you want your footwear to be both comfortable and foolish-looking, buy some crocs. They're like $10 a pair or something. If you want something to give you a real foot workout, get vibrams. If you don't want to spend any money, go run a mile or two barefoot on the beach (it's literally the exact same thing, but cheaper and better). If you want to flush $50 down the toilet for something that has no style and no real function, then go ahead get a pair of FitFlops.
*Nike Shox are the worst whoes ever made. Don't ever wear them. Ever. Literally throw them away if you own a pair. Seriously, I'll wait. I've got time.
***Just to be clear, I'm using FitFlops as the sacrificial lamb for all so-called "toner" shoes (any and all shoes that claim to tone your legs, thighs, or butt just by wearing them). Most toner shoes currently on the market are simply unstable crescent-shaped sole to make your feet rock back and forth. That unstable rocking motion forces your feet to work harder to keep you from drunkenly falling on your face. FitFlops use this technology in conjuntion with a hard heel/soft midsole/medium toe design, which (allegedly) forces your feet to work harder still to stabilize everything.***
FitFlops, one of the leading toner shoes currently on the market, force your feet to work harder to stabilize your body. They do this in two different ways. When you walk, you generally land on your heel, and then end up pushing off of your toe to go into the next step. This natural rocking motion is exaggerated slightly by FitFlops, causing your feet to work just a tiny bit harder to find it's equilibrium.
FitFlops also use a 3-layer "microwobbleboard" design. In the heel, they use a high density material. I don't know why, and I don't think they do either. It just seemed to fit I guess. Apparently, it absorbs 22% more shock than normal heel strikes do, which is great if you're trying to beat out the worst shoe ever made in a quality contest*.
From the high density heel, your bodyweight is forced into the midsole of the shoe, which is constructed of some sort of low-density, high-quality, inedible marhmallow-esque material. This makes your foot go "Whoa! What happened to that nice stable surface I was just working with back in the heel?".
From there, all that's left to do is push off of your toe into the next step. The toe of the FitFlop is made out of some medium-density material. Again, I don't know why, and I don't think the FitFlop people do either. They already used the high and low densities. Medium was really all that was left. Seriously, that's all I got on this one.
Here are just a few of the claims made by these shoes. FitFlops can, have, and/or will:
- relieve your knee pain
- treat scoliosis
- improve your posture
- relieve back pain
- give you Kate Moss' ass
- cure lupus. yes, lupus.
- allow you to breathe under water
- stop AND reverse the effects of global warming
- hunt down Osama Bin Laden and bring him to justice
- make you travel 88mph to send you back to the future
So what's my overall opinion on these shoe-tastrophies (yeah, I made that a word, what?!)? Save your money and your dignity, and invest in a pair of minimalist shoes, like some vibrams. Why? A whole bunch of reasons...
1) The only workout that FitFlops will give you (or any toner shoes for that matter) is a low-quality foot workout. Don't get me wrong, this is a very good thing. But they just do it in such a ridiculous way that I can't justify the benefits with the costs. Vibrams, one of the leading minimalist/barefoot shoes currently out there, will give your feet 10 times the foot workout that any toners ever will. This is because your foot has to stabilize everything every time you walk. There is no shoe to absorb shock or help stabilize or unstabilize your foot, or whatever these toners claim to do. Honestly, now that I think about it, I'm not even sure that the limited amount of science backing up FitFlops is sound.
2) Speaking of not making sense, just stay away from anything you see that uses a line like "patent-pending, muscle-loading, micro wobbleboard midsole technology". Whenever a company has to add adjectives like "muscle-loading" to their product, it's most likely bullshit.
3) One of the major drawbacks to these products is that, for as comfortable as they are, anybody wearing FitFlops looks ridiculous. Not even joking. That was and is one of the major roadblocks keeping more people from buying these pathetic excuses for shoes. If you want odd looks from people, buy some vibrams. They're so much cooler...
The upshot: If you want your footwear to be both comfortable and foolish-looking, buy some crocs. They're like $10 a pair or something. If you want something to give you a real foot workout, get vibrams. If you don't want to spend any money, go run a mile or two barefoot on the beach (it's literally the exact same thing, but cheaper and better). If you want to flush $50 down the toilet for something that has no style and no real function, then go ahead get a pair of FitFlops.
*Nike Shox are the worst whoes ever made. Don't ever wear them. Ever. Literally throw them away if you own a pair. Seriously, I'll wait. I've got time.
***Just to be clear, I'm using FitFlops as the sacrificial lamb for all so-called "toner" shoes (any and all shoes that claim to tone your legs, thighs, or butt just by wearing them). Most toner shoes currently on the market are simply unstable crescent-shaped sole to make your feet rock back and forth. That unstable rocking motion forces your feet to work harder to keep you from drunkenly falling on your face. FitFlops use this technology in conjuntion with a hard heel/soft midsole/medium toe design, which (allegedly) forces your feet to work harder still to stabilize everything.***
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U2 - Vertigo
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WOD 100811 Wednesday
Rest Day
U2 - Vertigo
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WOD 100811 Wednesday
Rest Day
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